Apologies for being so slack with my blog of late. I have unfortunately lacked motivation to talk about my current lack of motivation! Never again will I plan an event in the middle of winter. I thought it would give me the motivation to keep getting up on the minus 2 degree mornings, in the fog, in the dark etc... but it hasn't, it's only made me feel more and more guilty about missing training.
I've had an old running injury flare up again that mucked up my run training all of May, and came to a head during the City to Casino 11km fun run on May 20 - I literally haven't run since then, missing some of my favourite runs - the Lilydale Lope and Launceston 10, for example. No physio can put a name on the injury which is, to say the least, phenomenally frustrating. I just have to persist with my "glute strengthening" excercises, slowly get back into running and hope for the best.
There was as week spent in Melbourne for a work training course, and all of the long weekend wasted recovering from a cold.
So all in all a lot of wasted time and as you know, type A personality triathletes struggle to handle this without getting down on themselves and wondering if it is worth persisting, or should I just throw in the towel completely!
Of course life circumstances have changed a lot in the past few months which has in turn affected my attitude towards training and triathlon - in fact my whole outlook on life and sport.
I have felt the effects of a lack of passion for the sport lately but I think that's pretty normal, especially after the massive year I had last year, and not being able to run, my favourite discipline. I know a few people that seem to be going through the same thing (*cough* crossfit *cough*). Even having a couple of weeks off wasn't enough of a break mentally, more so than physically.
I haven't abandoned my dreams to become a professional triathlete, I think I've just got some more perspective on leading a balanced life - believe it or not there are other important things in life than triathlon! And what I think this means is that I will be able to race without putting such pressure on myself because winning does not equal happiness. Having a life does. And I want a long career out of tri's - I see people like Natascha Badmann winning Ironmans at 45 years of age, and Lisa Marangon making a living out of it while raising her son, which makes me think maybe I have time to get to that elite level without having to smash myself every day in my 20s. Of course there are people on the complete opposite end of the scale like Madeline Oldfield who is doing exactly what I hope to do at my age but she's in America training full time. And then you've got those recreational athletes kicking round town being able to train heaps more than I can - that's really annoying!
On the bright side, the break has given me a good opportunity to focus on my riding, which although inconsistent, is definitely improving.
I raced my first ever road races, which was extremely intimidating, but to my surprise I found that I liked it - and to my even greater surprise, I discovered I could win money!!
The 90km Bridge to Bicheno was the first race that I did on May 12. Melissa Clark and I started with two blokes as "F Grade" (it wasn't a real grade since we raced for E Grade prizemoney). We got away from them on the first climb and rode 65km on our own before being caught by E and D grade. I managed to stick with D grade up to the top of Cherry Tree Hill but lost them on the descent and rode solo for another few km before I caught one other solo rider and we took a few turns until just before Bicheno, where B Grade caught us and I managed to stick on Jason's wheel and get a free tow into town, where I won E Grade and first female.
I did have a very short-lived go at the crit the next day, which in hindsight was a silly idea, but I mainly did it to push myself out of my comfort zone and do something that scared me, which it certainly did.
The next race I wasn't even planning to do but it was Lilydale Lope day and I was so upset that I couldn't run that I had to do something. So I raced the Fred Keefe 80km St Leonards-Blessington. I started in E grade with just two guys and history repeated itself as I dropped them on the first major climb. I thought I should wait but I couldn't be bothered wasting the lead I had got on the climb so I went up the road by myself and at the 15km mark caught the two guys in F grade. One of them jumped on my wheel and just sat there as I punched into the wind all the way to 50km! Then A grade came past and I managed to jump on them for a few k's which disposed of the annoying wheelsucker. I was left alone again for a while until another BC rider Midday caught me along with two C grade riders and we took a few turns before B Grade caught us. I didn't last with them on the descent but Jason dropped off and towed me to the finish line (NOT that I needed him to, thankyou very much) and I won E grade and the ladies again.
The last race was Grindelwald (Tas Gas Challenge) and I ummed and aahed about doing this race for a long time, knowing how hard the course was, and on the day it turned out really windy.
But again I wanted to challenge myself and I went out there and started with E Grade although I was not "racing for prizemoney" due to the fact I didn't have a full $220 gold racing licence (I had an argument with Colin Burns over the fact I had been led to believe a 3 race licence would cover me for this, and didn't pay to upgrade on principle).
The pace was on from the word go and I was scared I wasn't going to hang on for the first lap! But I settled into a rhythm and the legs felt better than expected. In fact I led the bunch going up over Brady's all three times until D grade caught us. After this we were riding in a really big bunch which scared me a lot as my bike handling skills are, let's say, not the best. There was a fall right in front of me at one point, and a short gravel section, and the corner into Rosevears Drive, all of which scared me, and all of which I conquered! The last hill, Waldhorn Drive up to Grindelwald, was a world of pain but I actually made it and believe it or not I won E Grade again and was second in the ladies division.
Stupid Jason paid for my licence so I was eligible for the prize money and I took home $220, which paid for the licence :P
"Stupid Jason" also bought me a mountain bike. I've had two rides so far, caned both my knees, fallen off half a dozen times, scared myself silly, made myself look stupid, chucked a tantrum - and I absolutely love it. It's so much fun! I'm going to call it cross-training, not wasting time! So maybe it is taking time away from "real training", but it's much more fun and it's something different for the brain while still fitness-based. Also I'm hoping it's going to teach me better bike skills for cycling!
Speaking of cycling... I urge you to check out Hannah Grace Geelan's blog. I used to train with Hannah but now I wouldn't have a hope in hell of keeping up with her! What a fantastic rider and inspirational person.
Thanks to everyone who has stuck by me throughout personal, health-related and training-related dramas. Hang in there and I will be back stronger, faster and more passionate than ever before :)
